Many people object to watching the news because of the negative stories that are often featured. While much of the information may be a bitter pill to swallow and quite uncomfortable, I rejoice in reading and/or watching the news. Why? Because I feel as though when I do I am a part of the world. Without that connection to the Middle East, to China, to even the rest of the United States, my world seems two-dimensional.
I have been offered a position at my University’s newspaper to contribute as an opinion columnist, which is such an august opportunity for me. I have had two of my pieces printed which allowed me to see my own words and thoughts in a tangible form. I have been writing ever since I was able to and have filled up many a journal, authored a couple of blogs, and have served as a freelance blogger for other blog sites. Each of these sources published my words, but never printed them. There is a big difference, at least to me, reading words on a screen and reading them in printed form.
Whenever I think of writing for a newspaper I think back to (watch out for a throw back) the show “Sabrina”. You know the one, Sabrina was a teenage witch who lived with her spinster aunts and learned to hone her magic skills. In the later episodes Sabrina is in college and she is studying journalism, which she reminds viewers consistently in a whiny voice. Let’s admit that that show was already set up for failure because Sabrina and Harvey Kinkel broke up. If you have a Harvey Kinkle in your life, don’t let him/her go. Anyway, Sabrina’s spunky if not erratic tendencies in her newspaper office reminds me of myself (less annoying, at least I hope. And, I do not have an office) because after I read an interesting story in the paper I get myself all worked up. I can feel my opinions boiling and creating pressure strong enough to blow like Mt. Helen.
In reading about being fearless I am attempting to project my learnings on my semi-career as a journalist/writer. Writing is so sensitive. It is your innermost thoughts and sentiments written down, tender flesh exposed from underneath the exoskeleton of your brain, vulnerable to insults, harsh criticisms, and mockery. I feel a sense of embarrassment at times when writing my pieces. Is what I am actually writing valid? Am I understanding the situation? Will my voice be heard and not shunned? All such questions pester my inner writing soul; I will admit that it sometimes scares me away from writing.
In my journey to release fear from my life, I am developing a newfound sense of not just confidence but worthiness in my writing abilities. There is a reason that I was offered the position; I write with all my soul, never less.