This morning I had a craving. A craving for pumpkin and for reading the Bible. It seems that I have managed to let my reading schedule go all willy nilly this weekend with being on duty and such. Thankfully, I was able to devote some time this afternoon to reading the word and learning.
I am currently making my way through the book os Psalm which I absolutely adore. In reading Psalm 27 I was especially touched by the following quote:
“The Lord is my light and my
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life-
of whom shall I be afraid?”
This passage could not have been more perfect for what I am going through. There are so many unanswered questions and so much to think about (and yes, sometimes worry) that it is easier just to get scared call it quits and hide under your bed with a substantial amount of books and peanut butter. I question my decision to work for the Peace Corps, even though a part of me wonders whether God wants me to change the world in that regard. Does He?
I am obsessed with my planner. It is color coded and filled in through this entire semester. I love being able to peek ahead at the week to come and see what obstacles are there. Will I have a tough exam? A crammed week filled with RA duties? Or (sometimes) an easy week? That power in peeking into the future ahead of time is so fantastic.
I believe that God, in a sense, has a planner as well. He must have the best organization skills in his being able to keep track of all of us on the planet and such. If only I could snag that planner and just peek ahead a couple of years to make sure that I will be safe and taken care of, that my dreams will have come true, and that I am happy. Sadly, that will never happen. So I am left out in this limbo area wondering where I am going next.
Through my readings I have come to learn that it is important to have a strong sense of faith, a confident heart, and a hope for the best in these times. It sounds a lot easier said than done because, let’s face it, life gets scary at times.
I spent the greater majority of the day doing my RA job, including handling a flood and a strange situation with a room change. I pray that I am devoting enough time to my applications and my plans for the future and to not get too wrapped up in the little yukkity yucks of today. I feel so close to something beautiful.
This is my last night of rounds and duty for the weekend! I’m looking very much towards regaining my regular schedule. I would not like to see 2am for a long long time 🙂
Happy Saturday Night Live!