What We Don’t Ask For

Life is mysterious.

Sometimes we have really good days, filled with lots of love, fun, and the people that make us feel as though we belong.

Sometimes our hair embodies the spirit of medusa’s infamous locks, we spill coffee all over everything, and that cute guy in class catches you having a freak out moment in the back of the class as you realize that you forgot to do an assignment.

It has been a very long week. Bed time for me has been around midnight and wake up sunshine time is around 6 am. My days are completely filled with classes, work, scheduling meetings, studying (sometimes…), working out (yay running!), and eating (when I get an hour free to eat my daily rice and beans serving).

Today I was blessed enough to go to work and meet some new students who seem really interested in tutoring with me, which is always a great sign. By the end of my shift, I was dragging. I left, loaded down with my huge backpack, laptop case, lunch box, and iced coffee in hand, to go home and rest the whole evening. Just kidding. I then went to my psycholinguistics course and learned about speech production. But mostly I was watching a guide dog that was in the class rub its back all over the carpet. Yay for staying on task!

After class I went home and soaked in a nice bubble bath. Pssh. I don’t even have a bath tub. I ran back to my apartment unloaded my 500 lb backpack and then set out to a meeting for the service break trip that I will be leading. Now, you have to understand that at that meeting was a guy. A guy who I, at one point in my foolish years of youth, liked. Long story short, he stood me up for a date and then I reacted not so lady like (not my proudest moment) and never spoke to him again.

So naturally we are partners and co-site leaders for our service break trip. Meaning, we get to spend spring break together. Yay?

For some unseeable reason, God has put this young man in my life again. Front and center. Rather than resisting or being nasty or rude, I am letting go of all of the negativity. At the end of the day we will be working together to make something great happen. This trip will improve my future for the better and possibly land me into graduate school and one day even a career.

So, my dear, when you peel back that old decrepit band-aid you will see that there is neither scar nor scab left on your heart. Instead your heart is a touch warmer in that once wounded area. Warmer because it allows you to love bigger and better than you have ever done so in your life.

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